Linzy Bonham 00:00
I’ve been saying to m-my kids lately, you know, “Your job is to have fun and to learn.” Right? We take care of the other stuff, right?
Linzy Bonham 00:07
So it’s like we need them to learn about money, but they’re not responsible for the money, right? It’s not their problem if, you know, our business isn’t doing well and there’s not money coming in the door.
Linzy Bonham 00:16
Kids should not have to worry about that.
Linzy Bonham 00:23
Welcome to Money Skills for Therapists, the podcast that helps therapists and health practitioners in private practice go from money confusion and shame to calm, clarity, and confidence with their finances.
Linzy Bonham 00:34
If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed by numbers or avoided looking at your business money, you’re in the right place.
Linzy Bonham 00:39
I’m Linzy Bonham, therapist turned money coach and creator of Money Skills for Therapists.
Linzy Bonham 00:44
Before we jump in, I want to remind you of something really important.
Linzy Bonham 00:47
Most of us highly skilled and competent therapists and health practitioners were never taught about money, not in grad school, not in supervision, not anywhere.
Linzy Bonham 00:56
And yet, here we are running businesses that need to take care of us while we’re busy taking care of others.
Linzy Bonham 01:01
It is a lot of pressure.
Linzy Bonham 01:03
So if part of you feels anxious about money, avoidant, or like a bit of a hot mess financially, I want you to know that you are not alone and I am here to help.
Linzy Bonham 01:12
Through my workshops each month, I teach practical financial skills to help you feel more grounded, calm, and confident with your private practice money.
Linzy Bonham 01:19
You can see what’s coming up and save your spot to join live or register for the replay at moneyskillsfortherapists.com/workshops.
Linzy Bonham 01:26
Let’s get started.
Linzy Bonham 01:28
Hello and welcome back to the podcast.
Linzy Bonham 01:30
Today’s episode is a conversation with me and Diane Webber, my wonderful right-hand coaching woman, and it is an episode that was requested of us at a workshop that we did a little while ago.
Linzy Bonham 01:42
Afterwards, Marlo stayed and asked us if we had considered ever doing a podcast episode about parenting.
Linzy Bonham 01:49
So Marlo, this is your episode.
Linzy Bonham 01:51
It’s also the sign that when you ask for things, they might actually happen.
Linzy Bonham 01:55
I feel like, you know, therapists, we need to ask for more things in this life, and then sometimes we actually receive them.
Linzy Bonham 01:59
So this conversation today with Diane, we’re gonna chat about parenting and money, what we’ve tried to impart to our own children about money as parents, but also entrepreneurship and parenthood, and how entrepreneurship has shaped or supported or impacted us as parents.
Linzy Bonham 02:22
So Diane, welcome back to the podcast.
Diane Webber 02:24
Thanks, Linzy.
Diane Webber 02:25
So excited about this.
Linzy Bonham 02:27
Me too.
Diane Webber 02:28
Near and dear to my heart.
Linzy Bonham 02:29
It really is, and it’s today, I, I do feel like we have to say ’cause this is relevant.
Linzy Bonham 02:32
We’ve had to reschedule this recording twice because of my parenting.
Diane Webber 02:37
That’s right.
Linzy Bonham 02:38
So isn’t that just so relevant and topical?
Diane Webber 02:39
What a coincidence. Yeah.
Diane Webber 02:41
Yep.
Linzy Bonham 02:41
So we are finally meeting over lunch on a Monday afternoon, ’cause this is sometimes what parenting does to us is things don’t go to schedule. So I’m curious, Diane, let’s start with thinking about values and skills in your parenting.
Linzy Bonham 02:55
What have you really tried to impart to your sons?
Linzy Bonham 02:57
Actually, maybe let’s tell us a little bit about your sons, like the age of your kids, because I think that’s also helpful.
Diane Webber 03:01
Absolutely.
Diane Webber 03:02
So I have two sons.
Diane Webber 03:04
My older son Cameron is 20, and my younger son Jack is 15.
Linzy Bonham 03:09
And what have you tried to teach your kids about money over the years?
Linzy Bonham 03:12
I’m curious, as a parent, how have you thought about money?
Diane Webber 03:16
A very good question, and I would say that my conversations have evolved over time as my own relationship with money has become more confident, more calm, more fluid.
Diane Webber 03:28
I grew up in a household where, we did talk about money a lot, and I’m very grateful for that. It also is a household that I would say I got the memo that, that money is very special, very sacred, needs to be kept in a wallet, very organized.
Diane Webber 03:45
Like, there was this, this tightness around it, and a lot of, just look at it and watch it grow that was the memo that I got as a kid.
Diane Webber 03:53
And I think as a parent, I started that way, and I have really evolved over time.
Diane Webber 04:00
While I still think money is a very important resource and a tool, I’m much more fluid with it, especially if and when I see anxiety around it.
Diane Webber 04:10
I do think it’s something to be respected and regarded, and also, it’s a thing to be used to enjoy, like to enjoy life and to make decisions that you feel good about.
Diane Webber 04:20
So I’ve actually tried to loosen, my, the reins a little bit, which is a, it’s interesting ’cause it’s a little bit of undoing, unteaching. And I’ve, been able to do that by using some of my own experiences so that it’s not a matter of saying, “Never mind.
Diane Webber 04:34
What I told you then, forget that,” but more, “Here’s how I’m revisiting my own relationship with money,” as an invitation, I would say.
Diane Webber 04:42
And I’d say that more so with my older son than my younger one, simply because he’s in college and he’s very mindful right now of tuition costs and grocery costs and the cost of rent.
Diane Webber 04:52
Like, he’s very on top of all those things in a way that, I appreciate, but I also wanna say, “Let us still take care of you for a little bit longer.
Diane Webber 05:00
You’ve got a long time ahead of you to be an adult.
Linzy Bonham 05:02
Right.
Linzy Bonham 05:03
You get to be an adult forever.
Diane Webber 05:04
Exactly.
Diane Webber 05:05
Yeah.
Diane Webber 05:06
Yep.
Diane Webber 05:07
Jack has a slightly different relationship.
Diane Webber 05:09
He’s just a little more lax about it. Which matches his personality, too.
Diane Webber 05:14
Both of my sons, fortunately, love numbers and love math, and so that has been, a nice bonus as we sort of focus on our relationship with money in the household.
Linzy Bonham 05:25
Yeah, ’cause it makes me think about how, you know, our children’s own personalities with money is where too, you know, like what we have to teach them or model.
Linzy Bonham 05:33
Sometimes it’s gonna be also offsetting traits that they have, right?
Diane Webber 05:37
Absolutely.
Linzy Bonham 05:37
Like, if we have a kid who’s actually spendy, we’re gonna be leaning more into like, “Okay, well, let’s think about if we save this money for next week.
Linzy Bonham 05:43
If you save your allowance for next week, what could we get instead?” Whereas if you have a child who’s more like naturally tight energetically, gonna be more about instilling joy, right?
Linzy Bonham 05:51
And this is something I think about in general when we think about parenting advice, is sometimes parenting advice is very one size fits all.
Linzy Bonham 05:58
Like, this is what kids need, but kids need different things, and we parents also need different things to like offset our own stuff, like our own areas of like tightness or struggle.
Linzy Bonham 06:08
So yeah, I’m hearing your, your two kids are actually naturally very different about money.
Diane Webber 06:12
They are.
Diane Webber 06:13
They are.
Diane Webber 06:13
Yeah, their personalities in general are different, and they’re complementary, but they’re quite different, and their relationships with money in turn are quite different.
Diane Webber 06:22
I’m also in favor of being a little bit more transparent, especially given a lot of the conversations we’ve had in Money Skills for Therapists and in Money Skills for Group Practice Owners when money stories and personal history comes up where money was not talked about or, had very negative feelings around it.
Diane Webber 06:41
I’ve really tried to set up a culture in our household where we talk about things like saving money for a trip in a way that’s very open, without either of the boys feeling like they are responsible.
Diane Webber 06:54
You know?
Diane Webber 06:54
So it’s like, “Oh no, you know, I don’t need these new shoes ’cause we’re saving for a trip.”
Diane Webber 06:59
It’s like, “Oh, wait, wait a minute. No, you definitely… New shoes, good shoes are important, and we’re gonna be mindful about certain things because we wanna save for a family trip.”
Linzy Bonham 07:08
Always.
Diane Webber 07:09
A little bit of a.
Linzy Bonham 07:09
Yeah.
Linzy Bonham 07:10
They’re always listening and, and my son is younger, he’s seven. And we have a, a daughter living with us right now as well who’s also seven.
Linzy Bonham 07:17
So they’re at that age where they hear everything.
Linzy Bonham 07:19
My son likes to let me know that he hears everything.
Linzy Bonham 07:23
Like he will, with pride, report back, you know, overhearing a conversation.
Linzy Bonham 07:27
He’s like, “Oh, well I heard you say to Grandma da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da.” Um, yeah, you did.
Linzy Bonham 07:31
So, but there’s this saying that, children are excellent observers and lousy interpreters. Sometimes if our child hears us, for instance, like if they hear you and your partner, m- by you I mean the universal you, not you specifically, Diane.
Linzy Bonham 07:44
But if our kids hear us having like a tense conversation around money, we might just be like, you know, disagreeing about the best use for our money, but our kids can like pick up on that stress and hear a couple keywords and think, “Oh my God, we have no money
Diane Webber 07:55
Mm-hmm.
Linzy Bonham 07:56
Right?
Linzy Bonham 07:56
So it’s always this, um, I was gonna say a risk as parents.
Linzy Bonham 07:59
I don’t even know if it’s a risk.
Linzy Bonham 08:00
It’s just something for us to be mindful of, is that they’re hearing everything.
Linzy Bonham 08:03
So they’re gonna hear the stuff we don’t want them to hear, so we also have to think about what we do want them to hear.
Linzy Bonham 08:07
Like, let’s in some, some intentional messaging, intentional sharing of information.
Linzy Bonham 08:12
So I’m hearing for you, it’s like there’s a mindfulness about sharing that money is being managed, but also not wanting to make sure you’re not burdening your children.
Diane Webber 08:20
Exactly.
Linzy Bonham 08:21
Yeah.
Linzy Bonham 08:22
And this is something I think about, too.
Linzy Bonham 08:23
Like I’ve been, you know, having another kid in our family right now also gets me thinking about messaging, about like what are kids responsible for and what are adults responsible for?
Linzy Bonham 08:31
I’ve been saying to m-my kids lately, you know, “Your job is to have fun and to learn.” Right? We take care of the other stuff, right?
Linzy Bonham 08:38
So it’s like we need them to learn about money, but they’re not responsible for the money, right? It’s not their problem if, you know, our business isn’t doing well and there’s not money coming in the door.
Linzy Bonham 08:47
Kids should not have to worry about that.
Linzy Bonham 08:49
So it’s like, yeah, balancing that, helping them understand that it’s being taken care of and things are being done, but that they don’t have to worry about that, I think can be, can be a balancing act for parents Yeah.
Diane Webber 09:00
Absolutely.
Diane Webber 09:01
Yeah.
Linzy Bonham 09:02
Like, the biggest thing that I’ve tried to instill in my son, and I’ve, I’ve talked about this on the podcast before, given that, you know, he’s just seven, is just that money can do this for you or it can do that, but it can’t do both, So, you know, there’s, there’s the, the podcast, the, like, FIRE, the, financial independence retire early podcast, Afford Anything, their tagline being that you can afford anything, but you can’t afford everything.
Linzy Bonham 09:25
So since my son was three, I started a little too early, not surprisingly, I got too excited, I’ve been giving him weekly allowance in the dollar of his age. He gets $3 a week, and now my, my daughter also “gets the same dollar amount”.
Linzy Bonham 09:38
They get $7 a week now, and then they have that money, and then we go to the store.
Linzy Bonham 09:42
It’s like, “Okay, you have $14.
Linzy Bonham 09:44
Do you wanna buy this?
Linzy Bonham 09:45
Do you wanna buy that?
Linzy Bonham 09:46
And something that I’ve been so, heartened by to see is that my son now can do that over the years of us just going to a store where he will even take things… He’ll put things in the cart, you know.
Linzy Bonham 09:57
And by cart, I mean the basket at Dollarama ’cause, like, where else you go crazy with $14?
Diane Webber 10:01
Yeah Exactly.
Diane Webber 10:03
Yeah.
Diane Webber 10:04
And an actual cart, not an online shopping cart.
Linzy Bonham 10:06
No, you know, a basket, a literal physical basket, and he will put things back if he finds something else he likes more.
Linzy Bonham 10:12
And I’m like, “Oh my God. ‘Cause honestly, I feel like I’m still developing that skill as an adult.
Diane Webber 10:17
Yep, yep, yep.
Linzy Bonham 10:18
Isn’t that one of the hardest things about money? It’s like there’s only so much of it, right?
Linzy Bonham 10:22
And we can’t have this and this and this.
Linzy Bonham 10:23
We have to choose. And that has been something that I’ve felt quite proud of as a parent, that I can see early he understands that, and he’s able to do that, and he doesn’t feel angry or resentful or disempowered by not being able to have everything.
Linzy Bonham 10:36
In fact, he feels empowered of like, “Oh, okay, I have this much money, so I can have this, this, and this, or I can have just this, or I can get these things,” and he has, like, choice.
Linzy Bonham 10:45
So that.
Diane Webber 10:46
Mmhmm.
Linzy Bonham 10:47
Agency piece has been really important to me as a parent, and now that we have our daughter living with us, it’s also instilling that in her, which, you know, will take a while to kind of get her caught up to that place.
Linzy Bonham 10:57
But it’s like, “Yeah, this is your money. What do you wanna spend it on?”
Linzy Bonham 10:59
And you can spend it on, you know, what I would think is dumb shit.
Linzy Bonham 11:03
You can spend it on dumb shit because it’s your money. That’s the other thing is, like, my own money, I don’t want them spending on things that I think are garbage.
Diane Webber 11:10
Mm-hmm.
Linzy Bonham 11:11
But, you know, with the exceptions of things that are not allowed in our house, like kinetic sand, because it makes my husband lose his actual mind, and slime.
Linzy Bonham 11:17
These are the things that are banned from our household.
Diane Webber 11:20
Yeah, and it’s really powerful to pause and think would I want someone else telling me, like, you spent… You know, you hear it as adults too, “You spent how much on that car?
Diane Webber 11:29
You spent how much on those jeans?” And to be able to say, “Hey, I like to spend money on nice jeans,” or, “I don’t really care about fancy cars, so I’m happy with my econo car.”
Diane Webber 11:41
But when you start to, like, put value judgments on people’s choices around spending, it’s pretty interesting to notice viscerally what happens.
Linzy Bonham 11:50
Yeah, and, and yet I think that with children we try to, we tend to do that faster.
Linzy Bonham 11:54
Right?
Linzy Bonham 11:54
‘Cause “Oh, no, no, no, that’s not a good use of money. This is a good use of your money,” right? Different people.
Linzy Bonham 11:59
So I think about myself, much to my son’s dismay, our car is rusty we don’t really care about cars, right?
Linzy Bonham 12:06
So, you know, we, you know, we’ll go to school and other people are driving, like, Teslas or other cars.
Linzy Bonham 12:11
We have our 2010 Subaru Outback which we bought used, and which we haven’t replaced these two rusting panels ’cause we’re not sure how long it’s gonna last, and it just doesn’t seem like a great use of $2,000.
Linzy Bonham 12:21
Like, a choice we’re making. My son is quite embarrassed that our car is rusty, by the way.
Linzy Bonham 12:24
He’s getting old enough to be embarrassed by his parents.
Linzy Bonham 12:27
But I will turn around and spend $2,000 on something that’ll make our home feel, like, rich and welcoming and beautiful. That’s our big project.
Linzy Bonham 12:36
I just went to, I know you’ll understand this one, L.L.Bean on the weekend, bought a couple of just, like, really good shirts that I’m like, “Oh my God, these clothes have structure?”
Diane Webber 12:44
They’re gonna last forever.
Linzy Bonham 12:45
They’re not rags hanging from my body like my other clothing that I own.
Linzy Bonham 12:49
I will spend money on those things, but, you know, I don’t care about cars, right?
Linzy Bonham 12:53
Where somebody will spend 70K on their car because that’s really important to them, And, like, the older that I get, I’m like, “Who cares?” You know, we get to manage our money our way, and I think empowering our children to own what they like sooner and be able to be like, “Okay, maybe I want the Barbies, but I’m gonna have the Barbies and I’m not gonna be able to also get the notebook,” they’re making their choices and they’re learning what matters to them.
Diane Webber 13:15
I like having conversations too about, a goal. So my older son Cameron likes to work on cars, and he bought an old truck that he’s been fixing up for the last couple of summers.
Diane Webber 13:26
And so he might wanna replace the tires or replace some part, and he’ll talk about that, and he’ll save up for it.
Diane Webber 13:33
And then it feels really good to find that part and then actually replace it on the truck and then drive the truck and know he did all of that.
Diane Webber 13:41
Jack is more into games and electronics, and so he might want… Just the other day he wanted a new mouse ’cause his computer mouse wasn’t working.
Diane Webber 13:50
And, you know, a mouse is something I’m… Actually, now that I have thumb stuff, I like a nice mouse also.
Diane Webber 13:56
But, you know, a mouse isn’t necessarily something I personally would spend a lot of money on, but I know that he really enjoys gaming.
Diane Webber 14:02
It’s something he does with a lot of his friends, and they have a ton of good laughs.
Diane Webber 14:06
And so if he wants a nice mouse, he’ll say, “I’ve saved up my money, and now I wanna go to Best Buy and get this particular mouse.”
Diane Webber 14:12
And I’m like, “Okay, let’s go do it.”
Linzy Bonham 14:14
That’s great.
Diane Webber 14:16
So there’s a pride piece in there in a really nice way.
Linzy Bonham 14:18
For sure, and it’s, and it’s agency if that is what matters to you, if you love gaming with your friends, and you’re probably also gonna get thumb issues like your mom ’cause you’re on the computer so much.
Diane Webber 14:26
Right.
Linzy Bonham 14:28
Then that’s a great investment, right?
Linzy Bonham 14:31
So the other piece I wanna talk about and think about together is entrepreneurship and parenting, right?
Linzy Bonham 14:38
‘Cause this is… Entrepreneurship is a whole other realm of money, right?
Linzy Bonham 14:43
‘Cause it’s like we are, we have chosen to build our own businesses, therefore, we don’t have jobs that are just fixed.
Linzy Bonham 14:50
There’s not just a certain amount of money you can make, but also it means that we have all the responsibility of a business and all the freedom of a business.
Linzy Bonham 14:57
I’m curious for you, how has entrepreneurship impacted your parenting or money with your kids?
Linzy Bonham 15:05
Like, how have you seen it show up?
Diane Webber 15:07
I think, it’s a great question, and I’ve, I thought about it a lot over the last couple days since we’ve rescheduled this a couple times.
Diane Webber 15:14
It’s just been like churning in my head.
Diane Webber 15:16
And, because my sons are older and I started my private practice when they were in first and seventh grade, and they’re now in college and ninth grade, I’ve really felt that sense of I’m running out of time.
Diane Webber 15:31
So f- in the previous years, I had a lot of opportunity to adjust my schedule based on the needs around driving or taking to practices or lessons or different things like that.
Diane Webber 15:44
And as they’ve gotten older, there’s like a cherish piece that I really cherish the time that I can spend with them and, and I’ve b- gotten much more intentional about my schedule so that I don’t miss things if I don’t have to.
Diane Webber 15:59
And so I feel like entrepreneurship has, really put a lot more personal responsibility it’s like both an opportunity and a joy, but it’s also like I am the boss, which means yep, I’m the boss and I’m the boss, so I take care of myself and I look to myself to take care of myself.
Diane Webber 16:17
And so, as I’ve gotten better at it, I’ve protected my schedule more.
Diane Webber 16:22
I’ve really thought twice about offering times to be available for either clinical work or coaching work, and also had more conversations with the family.
Diane Webber 16:32
So with everyone, I said, “Okay, I’m gonna work two evenings a week, which opens up my days a little bit more.
Diane Webber 16:38
Which evenings would you like need to be ‘not available’?” And everyone was like, “Monday and Tuesday.
Diane Webber 16:43
Get ’em out of the way early.” And I said, “Okay, then that’s what I’ll do.” So there’s been a nice, like, collaboration happened, and, being able to just participate in some things that I couldn’t do when I had a nine-to-five job has been a, a real treat, and I’m really gr- really grateful for it.
Linzy Bonham 17:00
Mm-hmm.
Linzy Bonham 17:00
Yeah, that time freedom piece is huge.
Linzy Bonham 17:03
And Rodrigo and I have just been freshly appreciating that now that we have our, our foster daughter in our life, and taking her to medical appointments and all these different things.
Linzy Bonham 17:11
Like he said to me the other day, he was like, “Oh my God, imagine we were working for somebody else.
Diane Webber 17:16
Yep.
Linzy Bonham 17:16
We wouldn’t be able to do any of this.
Linzy Bonham 17:17
We would have to ask permission to all of these appointments.” And like, I feel like no boss, no corporate boss for very long would be like, “Oh, that’s fine.
Linzy Bonham 17:25
Yeah.
Linzy Bonham 17:25
Oh, you’re missing… Oh, okay, you’re gone again?
Linzy Bonham 17:27
Oh yeah, sure.” You know, at a certain point it’d be like, “Mm, this is too much.”
Linzy Bonham 17:30
But yeah, that time freedom and the ability to be present with family, like that flexibility is huge. Huge.
Linzy Bonham 17:38
And I think it also signals to the kids that they matter, right?
Linzy Bonham 17:42
Which like, which is privilege that we can do that, and a gift that we can do that.
Linzy Bonham 17:46
‘Cause I remember as a child really feeling, what’s the word I would say?
Linzy Bonham 17:52
Mm, forgotten during the day thing.
Linzy Bonham 17:56
You know, like, “Mom and Dad have to work,” and I’m like, “But, but what about me?” Because my parents didn’t have that kind of flexibility, and they couldn’t like, you know, pick us up a little bit early because, you know, things have been a little bit hard lately or something, right?
Linzy Bonham 18:07
Like they… My dad was an entrepreneur, but his business was not doing great.
Linzy Bonham 18:11
He worked in another city.
Linzy Bonham 18:12
You know, there was a lot of stress there, and then eventually he went and worked for somebody else. So he did not have that kind of time freedom, nor is that the way that he used maybe opportunity that he did have.
Linzy Bonham 18:20
That, that wasn’t a priority for him.
Linzy Bonham 18:21
He was like, “No, I’m Gotta work.” And my mom did not have the flexibility ’cause she was like, you know, corporate, kind of like upper, upper management level, you know, in the ’90s as a woman, where I think she also had to show up and show that she was there, and she could work as hard as men.
Linzy Bonham 18:36
And was she didn’t take a lot of time off to be a mom, beyond like things like taking us to the dentist and the, the essentials, But I remember feeling quite jealous, that my parents’ workplaces got all of their time and attention.
Linzy Bonham 18:47
One of the beautiful things about entrepreneurship is we do get to choose, and I’m so excited for the, what you’re talking about, where they get to the age where you do get to collaborate how do we set this up for our family?
Linzy Bonham 18:59
What do we all need?” You know, “When, when do you want me to not be available so I can be available the other days?” That’s very exciting to me to think about that stage of parenting, which I think is coming sooner than I, than I think.
Linzy Bonham 19:10
To also really to help them feel like, okay, our family is important and I have to work, ’cause otherwise we won’t have literally anything.
Linzy Bonham 19:17
But.
Diane Webber 19:18
Yep.
Linzy Bonham 19:18
How can I work in a way that gives us like the presence and lets us be together, as well as earning the money to pay for our life?
Diane Webber 19:25
Absolutely.
Diane Webber 19:26
Yeah.
Linzy Bonham 19:26
A very, a very cool thing.
Linzy Bonham 19:28
I mean, the thing that has been interesting for me about entrepreneurship, and I would say my, my entrepreneurship, like owning this business, has been more variable than yours in terms of like feast and famine seasons, cycles and, you know, we, we’ve been running, this business now- Since 2020 full-time, so I’m, I’m coming into almost seven full years now of business and kind of like highs and lows.
Linzy Bonham 19:51
But something that, Augie, my son, used to say when we were little is, ’cause he’d hear us say it, is he’d say, “We got a sale,” in his little toddler voice.
Linzy Bonham 20:00
Because over the years, I, I unfortunately don’t have this anymore, but we used to have an automation on my phone that when we had a sale come through, for Money Skills for Therapists, for the program, I would get a text, and the text would say, “Hey rockstar, you’ve made a sale.” And then it would say the name, “Nancy has signed up through the Facebook funnel.” And then I would say, “We got a sale!”
Linzy Bonham 20:20
And so Augie picked up this phrase, and so he’s definitely, grown up in, you know, entrepreneurship is in, in the air.
Linzy Bonham 20:28
And I think what I’m hoping he will see from it is like you can make an effort, and it can have an impact, ’cause that to me is one of the best parts of entrepreneurship, right?
Linzy Bonham 20:38
Is it’s you can be strategic, you can hustle, you can say, “I’m gonna do this thing, and I’m gonna figure it out,” and then there’s actually a tangible result that comes from that, which is so powerful, right?
Linzy Bonham 20:48
Like, I feel like I am modeling to him especially, that you can make things happen in your world, And you can, like, ratchet it up, and you can ratchet it up, down, like we can choose.
Linzy Bonham 20:58
You know, we just had a conversation this morning in our meeting of like, “Okay, Money Skills for Group Practice Owners cohort looks like it’s gonna fill up. Do we wanna make it bigger? Do we wanna add another call time?”
Linzy Bonham 21:06
And I was like, “Actually, no.
Linzy Bonham 21:08
Right now I don’t.
Linzy Bonham 21:09
So we get to also control what happens to us, and that I think is a really powerful modeling, which is not how entrepreneurship was modeled to me, because my dad’s business was not successful.
Linzy Bonham 21:18
It was quite the opposite.
Diane Webber 21:19
No.
Diane Webber 21:19
Mm-hmm.
Linzy Bonham 21:20
What was modeled to me is like, ugh, entrepreneurship is like a weight around your neck, and you’re gonna lose money, and it’s gonna be hard and heavy, and I think I’m giving my son the opposite example, which is like, it’s fun, it’s creative, it’s light.
Linzy Bonham 21:31
It’s like, let’s go.
Linzy Bonham 21:32
Okay, we’re good.
Linzy Bonham 21:33
We can rest now.
Linzy Bonham 21:34
Um, really modeling to him this impact that you can make.
Diane Webber 21:38
Right.
Diane Webber 21:38
And also kind of piggybacking on that, I found myself having a lot of conversations over the summer with Cameron especially about this, is he had a internship, with a civil engineering firm, which was great experience.
Diane Webber 21:49
But also his time home was limited, and so we had a lot of conversations about would you rather work and get the work experience, or would you rather spend time with friends that you don’t see very often?
Diane Webber 22:01
And sometimes it’s money happily forfeited to have an experience, and other times he was saying no to social outings because he had plenty and would rather have a little more money in the bank.
Diane Webber 22:14
And so to be able to make that choice and have a, a conversation around it and make a decision that you feel good about, I think is really nice, especially in our cultures that, that push for more, more, more.
Diane Webber 22:26
It’s like, you know, work 50, 60 hours a week, just earn more.
Diane Webber 22:28
How much can you earn by the end of the summer?
Diane Webber 22:31
A- at what price?
Diane Webber 22:33
In other ways, relationally, life experience, and things like that.
Diane Webber 22:37
So not only being, living it as an entrepreneur, but then being able to have conversations to say, “How do you wanna spend your time?”
Diane Webber 22:46
You know, is spending time earning some money important to you right now, or is spending time with family and friends more important?
Diane Webber 22:53
Sometimes you have to make a choice, but to be able to feel good about that choice I think is a really nice thing to build now so that they can make decisions for themselves later that they make, like, with their whole heart and not just their heads.
Linzy Bonham 23:06
Absolutely.
Linzy Bonham 23:06
And it does make me think about the phrase that I’ve used in the last year or two about, like, what season are you in or chapter are you in?
Linzy Bonham 23:14
Like, really naming, you know, okay, in this season, for some folks listening, it might be that you have a new baby, and it’s okay you’re exhausted.
Linzy Bonham 23:22
Everything is kind of always weird and dirty all the time, and yet it’s this precious time.
Linzy Bonham 23:26
So is it time to hustle in your business?
Linzy Bonham 23:28
Probably not.
Linzy Bonham 23:29
It’s time to enjoy this very specific season that you’re in that will change.
Linzy Bonham 23:34
And that’s what I hear you asking Cameron with that question is like, well, what season is this?
Linzy Bonham 23:37
Like, is it time to hustle hard and make as much as you can?
Linzy Bonham 23:40
Is it time to really be with these friends for the time that you can?
Linzy Bonham 23:43
Is it about balance?
Linzy Bonham 23:44
Like, what do you need in this season of your life?
Linzy Bonham 23:46
And being able to stop and reflect on that, I think, is a crucial skill, um, ’cause that also lets us know what does our time need to look like?
Linzy Bonham 23:55
What, how much do we need to work?
Linzy Bonham 23:56
But also, like, what can money do for us right now? What is the purpose of money right now? And I’ve noticed for myself, with things going well in the business and, like, building this house right now, you know, I, I will say somebody said to me the other day, that right now, you know, like, everybody’s struggling.
Linzy Bonham 24:11
Everybody doesn’t have money.
Linzy Bonham 24:12
Everybody d- And I was like, “Not everybody.” I’m like, “I’m actually doing well.” I can’t, I can’t fill your group practice, to be clear.
Linzy Bonham 24:18
There’s only one me.
Linzy Bonham 24:19
But, you know, like, for me right now, things are going quite well.
Linzy Bonham 24:24
You know, like, the business, we’ve, we’ve done a lot of investing in the business over the years.
Linzy Bonham 24:27
I’ve built a lot of skills.
Linzy Bonham 24:28
I’ve been around for a while.
Linzy Bonham 24:29
People know my name.
Linzy Bonham 24:30
So we’re at a season that feels actually really, abundant, an abundant season in my life.
Linzy Bonham 24:36
And so I’ve also been thinking about, from a parenting perspective, what can this money do for my kids?
Linzy Bonham 24:42
So I, I was having dinner with a friend on Friday, a good friend from my, my master’s, and I was telling her about the different things that we’re doing, you know, stuff for our foster kiddo and supports for my son and him being in outdoor school.
Linzy Bonham 24:52
And, another kiddo that we’ve mentored who’s now 24 years old, talking to him the other day about paying for him to have some private s- psychiatric assessment done ’cause he has not been getting good public services, and just being able to do that, and she was like, “I wish I was one of your kids.”
Diane Webber 25:09
Mmhmm.
Linzy Bonham 25:10
This is what money’s for, right?
Linzy Bonham 25:11
It’s like, make sure that their needs are being met, you know, so that they’re able to, like, grow and be well and thrive, and money is so powerful for that.
Linzy Bonham 25:20
And in Canada, we’re lucky to have a public system that covers lots of great things, but it does not cover occupational therapy, and it does not cover trauma therapy, and it does not cover good psychiatric care.
Linzy Bonham 25:29
Unfortunately, public psychiatric care in Canada is not very good. And those are the moments where being an entrepreneur and being able to have, like, a variable income where you can build things that work and make more money is so powerful ’cause then we can, we can give our kids those things that they need without it being a nail-biter or a hardship as “Ugh, can we afford this?”
Linzy Bonham 25:50
Like, it’s like, yeah, we can, we can afford this, and we will afford this ’cause this is what actually matters.
Diane Webber 25:55
Yeah.
Diane Webber 25:55
And in that scenario, that, that psychiatric assessment can provide clarity for him on what he needs that will help him thrive.
Diane Webber 26:04
So it’s money well spent.
Linzy Bonham 26:05
Yeah.
Linzy Bonham 26:05
Like, these are all very, very good investments, and especially investing in kids, right?
Linzy Bonham 26:09
‘Cause, like, kids so resilient, and if they have their needs met and certain problems solved at the age of seven, 12, 24, we’re saving them decades of struggling.
Linzy Bonham 26:20
Like, we know, for many adults, women specifically, who are just being diagnosed with ADHD now. Imagine that they had got this diagnosis back when they were 15.
Diane Webber 26:32
Mmhmm.
Linzy Bonham 26:32
How much pain it would’ve saved them to understand, like, “Oh, this is how my brain works, and all these different things that I feel like are wrong with me are actually the same thing, and it can be managed with the, these kinds of tools and these kinds of interventions.
Diane Webber 26:42
Mm-hmm.
Linzy Bonham 26:43
What a difference that would make to their quality of life, right?
Linzy Bonham 26:46
And as parents, we can give our kids those resources, and we can help them get the help they need now rather than have them struggle for decades.
Diane Webber 26:55
Yeah, and there’s a certain amount of sense of I’m worth it also that sort of warrants a little bit of fighting up against. At least that was sort of the message I got of like, “Oh, no, no, that’s, that’s too expensive for me. I’ll get this cheap something something.” And so to be able to just sort of challenge that, and especially if it’s medical care or some piece of equipment that’s important.
Diane Webber 27:16
Like last night, Jack asked about getting a new lacrosse helmet, and he … Everyth- all his equipment has been hand-me-down.
Diane Webber 27:22
And he’s like, “Just wondering, could I get a new helmet?” And I instantly said, “Of course.
Diane Webber 27:28
Absolutely.” You know, so things like that where they … Like, he’s worth it, of course.
Diane Webber 27:33
It’s something he enjoys.
Diane Webber 27:34
We’re definitely gonna get you good equipment for that.
Diane Webber 27:37
And then I figure it out later how we’re gonna do it.
Diane Webber 27:39
But to be able to just, you know, helps them feel like they are not a burden, that they are, you know, in, in mon- they are worthy of money being spent on them.
Diane Webber 27:49
So we teach them good stewardship, but we also teach them, like, you deserve treats.
Linzy Bonham 27:53
And you’re important, and your brain is important, and we’re gonna protect it.
Diane Webber 27:57
And we’re gonna protect.
Diane Webber 27:57
Yes.
Linzy Bonham 27:58
You know, there’s, there’s, in, in our family, ’cause we just bought my foster daughter a new helmet, it’s made me realize, like, “Oh, shit, I think my bike helmet’s, like, 25 years old.” Like, we should.
Diane Webber 28:06
Yeah.
Linzy Bonham 28:07
We should also have good helmets.
Diane Webber 28:07
Like all the foam is like breaking down, and you’re like.
Linzy Bonham 28:09
Wait a second, all of our brains are important.
Linzy Bonham 28:11
And that’s an interesting thing, too, that I notice sometimes when I… When we do pay attention to something and kind of fix it, you’re like, “Oh, wow, okay, yeah, this, this area of my life I’ve been neglecting.” So in my, I mean, my family, I have to say, it’s gonna be new bike helmets for everybody ’cause we all, all of our brains are important.
Diane Webber 28:27
Yep.
Linzy Bonham 28:28
This is what we hear so often from our therapists that we work with, our students, is as children, they felt burdened with the financial issues of their family.
Diane Webber 28:36
Yep.
Linzy Bonham 28:36
And I’m sure their parents didn’t mean to burden them.
Linzy Bonham 28:38
They weren’t like, “Hmm, let’s get our seven-year-old involved in this conversation because she has a lot to bring to the table in terms of like our, you know, defaulting on our mortgage.” But children do hear those things, so I think we need to message to our kids, “I’ve got this.
Linzy Bonham 28:51
Like, I’m taking care of this.
Linzy Bonham 28:52
Things are being managed.
Linzy Bonham 28:53
This is,” you know, like I’ve been saying to my kids lately, “Your job is to have fun and to learn,” right? As they get older, they’ll learn more and more, and they’ll start being responsible.
Linzy Bonham 29:02
But when they’re little, we’ve got it.
Linzy Bonham 29:03
We’re taking care of it, right?
Linzy Bonham 29:05
Like, this is part of how we take care of you, and this is part of how our family, takes care of each other.
Diane Webber 29:10
Yep.
Linzy Bonham 29:10
Yeah.
Linzy Bonham 29:11
Are there any final thoughts about parenting and money?
Diane Webber 29:14
I’m thrilled that things are shifting and so that has become an important thing. Think in previous generations it was, you know, much like other topics, you don’t talk about it, but then how are you supposed to be good at it if you don’t talk about it?
Diane Webber 29:29
I noticed this in my own friendships.
Diane Webber 29:30
We talk about money in the household a lot more and in a very neutral way. And so it’s nice to see that children are doing that as well, you know, and, and they’re having some nice conversations either with us or with their f- each other, like with their friends in a way that I’m pleased to see.
Diane Webber 29:49
So it gives me some hope.
Linzy Bonham 29:50
Yeah, like there’s a larger cultural shift there.
Linzy Bonham 29:53
It’s not just us.
Linzy Bonham 29:55
Yeah, and I would say actually, if you think about this from an entrepreneurship perspective I would actually say probably our business is doing well because there’s a larger cultural window here that’s opening people are like, “Wait a second, us not talking about this is not working,” which makes people more open to getting help with money and identifying, yeah, this is a set of skills that I don’t have and I’m gonna go get help with it, right?
Linzy Bonham 30:14
And so I think, yeah, whenever our entrepreneurship is working, it also means that we’re meeting a moment culturally. And the moment is like, let’s talk about money more ’cause not talking about it has not worked for us.
Linzy Bonham 30:24
Yeah.
Diane Webber 30:25
Yeah, and especially in our community, like you mentioned, a lot of the therapists we work with, highly sensitive, highly perceptive, highly receptive, which means we, we pay attention to everything and have a tendency to internalize things that, in maybe not so helpful ways.
Diane Webber 30:42
So for us to help to help them redefine their definition of money, their relationship with money, both as humans and as business owners, is a real treat.
Diane Webber 30:52
It’s a gift, and it’s really fun to see that shift that comes over time.
Linzy Bonham 30:58
Completely agree.
Linzy Bonham 30:59
Well, Diane, thank you for being on the podcast today.
Diane Webber 31:02
Thanks for having me, Linzy.
Diane Webber 31:03
It’s two of my favorite topics.
Linzy Bonham 31:05
Fun.
Linzy Bonham 31:06
I know.
Linzy Bonham 31:06
This, this could be like a seven-part series.
Linzy Bonham 31:08
Maybe one day it will be.
Linzy Bonham 31:09
We’ll see.
Linzy Bonham 31:10
We’ll see.
Linzy Bonham 31:11
But yeah, just thinking about, you know, money, teaching our kids skills about money.
Linzy Bonham 31:15
You know, for folks listening, I would encourage you to think about, yeah, what, what are the messages you want your kids to be getting about money?
Linzy Bonham 31:20
What are the skills that are age-appropriate for them that you could be supporting them with?
Linzy Bonham 31:24
And as Diane mentioned, too, we can also grow in front of our children.
Linzy Bonham 31:28
Like, we don’t have to stay the way that we were when we started teaching them about money.
Linzy Bonham 31:33
We can also show them like, “Hey, I’ve realized that this thing about money has become true for me now.
Linzy Bonham 31:37
I’m like, I would like money to bring more joy into our life.
Linzy Bonham 31:40
As a family, let’s talk about if we have this 100 bucks, what’s the best thing this 100 bucks can do for us?” Like, I just think there’s so much richness and opportunity there to name that we ourselves are also growing and changing around money, that it’s a relationship that can grow and change.
Linzy Bonham 31:54
It’s the best modeling we can do, right?
Linzy Bonham 31:56
Like I’ve said this to our students before, is that learning about money and showing your children that you can build new skills and change no matter what age you are, no matter where you’ve come from, that as parents is the most powerful thing we can model.
Diane Webber 32:08
That’s huge.
Linzy Bonham 32:09
Right?
Linzy Bonham 32:09
Is that we can solve problems, and we can learn and grow and change.
Linzy Bonham 32:11
We don’t have to be like born into money.
Linzy Bonham 32:14
We don’t have to be perfect at it, you know, but that we can always be improving the way that we manage money, and our kids seeing us grow and change is so powerful.
Linzy Bonham 32:24
So for folks listening, if you are interested in being further into our world, our WhatsApp community is really bopping, I have to say.
Linzy Bonham 32:32
Uh, I’m, I’m having so much fun in the WhatsApp community.
Linzy Bonham 32:34
Diane, can you tell folks a little bit about the WhatsApp community if they don’t know about it already?
Diane Webber 32:38
Sure, sure.
Diane Webber 32:39
So the WhatsApp community is free, and it’s available to anyone who’s either, interested in one of our programs or has recently graduated from one or has a long time ago graduated.
Diane Webber 32:49
It’s really open to anyone who is interested in the topics. We have a general space, and then we have, sub-spaces within the WhatsApp community, which include, a place where we post and talk about our most recent podcasts, a place where we post about our workshops, our upcoming workshops, and/or a recent workshop that just happened.
Diane Webber 33:09
So it’s a place to kind of talk about it, take takeaways, reflections, and things like that.
Diane Webber 33:14
And then we have two spaces.
Diane Webber 33:16
One is for solo practice owners, and the other is for group practice owners.
Diane Webber 33:20
They’re open to everybody, but it’s a space where people who are in those unique situations can talk about it or, for example, any solo practice owners who are interested in group practice can pose questions to those who already have group practices.
Diane Webber 33:33
Really great conversations. Some folks organized an in-person get-together in Maryland.
Diane Webber 33:38
There’s some talk about one in Delaware, the Philadelphia area. There’s some group practice owners that are getting together over Zoom in Ontario.
Diane Webber 33:47
So there’s some really nice connections that are being made.
Diane Webber 33:49
We’re having a lot of fun with It.
Linzy Bonham 33:51
Yeah, it is, it is a lot of fun.
Linzy Bonham 33:52
And, it’s fun too to see people, like, chat about the, the podcast episodes.
Linzy Bonham 33:56
There’s, a, a listener of the podcast, Allison, who, I run into sometimes ’cause I take my son to her group practice to see one of her OTs, and she had mentioned to me before, you know, like, it’s like you listen to the podcast, and then she sees me at the clinic.
Linzy Bonham 34:08
She’s like, “I just wanna talk to you about the podcast.” And so this is the space where we can actually, like, talk about the episodes and folks share their takeaways and, we can have questions. This coming week we’re gonna be bringing in, Steph Davis and Cecilia Mannella, whose episode is gonna be coming out.
Linzy Bonham 34:22
They’re gonna be coming in to answer questions and do a call with our WhatsApp community about leadership and group practice.
Linzy Bonham 34:27
So we also do private calls just for our WhatsApp community, so it’s fun.
Linzy Bonham 34:31
We’re having a lot of fun.
Linzy Bonham 34:32
We’re building it as we go ’cause that’s entrepreneurship and we love it. But yes, Diane does a great job.
Diane Webber 34:36
Mm-hmm.
Diane Webber 34:37
Oh.
Linzy Bonham 34:37
Facilitating in there and taking care of everybody.
Linzy Bonham 34:43
So thank you so much everybody for listening today.
Linzy Bonham 34:44
If you are interested in joining the WhatsApp group, you can just email us.
Linzy Bonham 34:47
We’ll send you the form where you can join for free. We so appreciate you listening today.
Diane Webber 34:53
We hope to see you there.
